Because really, what's cooler than being mistaken for a misunderstood figure from church history?
Every year, a nearby community celebrates Tulip Time. This year, it begins Saturday.
Even though we live less than 30 minutes away, we avoid that town during Tulip Time as much as possible. (Edited to add: It's not the event that I can't handle, it's the crowds. Blame seven years battling LA traffic.)
But maybe some year I'll go to the festival dressed up as John Calvin, and wear a sandwich board with the doctrines of grace painted on it, and when people look at me funny I'll be like, "What?! It's TULIP Time, right?"
Although it might be a great opportunity to explain that Calvin himself didn't come up with that system, and that the so-called "five points of Calvinism" were actually written by others 55 years after Calvin's death.
But explaining the difference between Calvin's concept of sovereign grace and the five points attributed to him could be a little tricky, since it's been misunderstood for centuries despite the efforts of people far smarter than I.
So maybe I'll just stay home and celebrate Tulip Time with one of these: